Forms of Address in Chinese
Within families, adults are rarely referred to by their given names. Rather, the relationship is stressed, so each member is known by this connection. Thus, there is big sister, second sister, third sister and so on. These connections are also distinguished by what side of the family they are on. Generally speaking though, the family title is only used when the relative being called is older than caller. It is considered highly inappropriate and sometimes extremely offensive if a person from a younger generation calls someone from an older generation by his/her given name. Younger relatives are normally only called by their relational title in formal situations. Children can be called by their given name, or their parents may use their nickname.
When speaking of non-family social acquaintances, people are generally referred to by a title, for example Mother Li (李妈妈 lĭ māma) or Mrs. Zhu (朱太太zhū tàitai). Personal names are used when referring to adult friends or to children, although, unlike in the west, referring to somebody by their full name (including surname) is common even among friends, especially if the person's full name is only two syllables. It is common to refer to a person as lăo (老, old) or xiăo (小, young) followed by their family name, thus Lăo Wáng (老王) or Xiăo Zhāng (小張, 小张). Xiăo is also frequently used as a diminutive, when it is typically paired with the second or only character in a person's name, rather than the surname. Note that because old people are well respected in Chinese society, lăo (old) does not carry disrespect, offense or any negative implications even if it's used to refer to an older woman. Despite this, it is advisable for non-Chinese to avoid calling a person xiăo-something or lăo-something unless they are so-called by other Chinese people and it is clear that the appellation is acceptable and widely used. Otherwise, the use of the person's full name, or alternatively, their surname followed by xiānshēng (先生, mister) or nǚshì (女士, madam) is relatively neutral and unlikely to cause offense. Whereas titles in many cultures are commonly solely determined by gender and, in some cases, marital status, the occupation or even work title of a person can be used as a title as a sign of respect in common address in Chinese culture. Because of the prestigious position of a teacher in traditional culture, a teacher is invariably addressed as such by his or her students (李老師; Lǐ Lǎoshī; literally "Teacher Li"), and commonly by others as a mark of respect. By extension, a junior or less experienced member of a work place or profession would address a more senior member as "Teacher".
Similarly, engineers are often addressed as such, though often shortened to simply the first character of the word "engineer" -- 工Gōng. Should the person being addressed be the head of a company (or simply the middle manager of another company to whom you would like to show respect), one might equally address them by the title "zŏng" (总), which means "general" or "overall", and is the first character of titles such as "Director General" or "General Manager" (李总 Lĭ zŏng), or, if they are slightly lower down on the corporate food-chain but nonetheless a manager, by affixing Jīnglĭ (经理, manager).
